New Year New Family Part 3



New Year New Family Part3 – Wives 1 Peter 3:1-6

INTRO> Today in our text, there are some very offensive words when you first read over them that almost make your skin crawl. But it’s times like these that we are reminded that this is God’s Word, and just because i don’t like it, doesn’t mean that it’s not from the Lord and good for us.

CONTEXT> The context in 1 Peter is huge to understand. Peter is writing to suffering Christians that are under persecution. In verse’s 13-20 he talks about submission, to governing authorities, and that when people see you submit, they will see the beauty of the Gospel in your life. Then in Chapter 3 he moves into what that looks like in a marriage. 

TRANS> This week is wives, next week is husbands… men, don’t miss next week. God’s Word every time it speaks to the role of the wife in marriage speaks to this idea of submission.

  • “Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” – Colossians 3:18
  • “young women to love their husbands and children, to be self controlled, pure working at home, kind and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.” Titus 2:5
  • “wives submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord… Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”- Ephesians 5:22-24

TRANS> So what are we to do with this then? This at first glance seems to be highly offensive and how can we make sense of this? We are not people of “submission” by nature. Here is what we are gonna look at today, What Submission ISN’T, What submission IS and What submission looks like.

  1. What Submission ISN’T
  • Submission is not Inferiority- This is major to understand! The very fact that Peter is even addressing women in his letter is huge! Women ARE NOT inferior to men in any way in God’s eyes.  Think of creation, how was Eve made? “The woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not made out of his head to rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be beloved.” ― Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry’s Commentary on the Whole Bible

APP> So what does this mean then? Men and women are equal is value but different in roles. *ILL- Break Pedal Gas Pedal

  • Submission is not Absolute- every time this idea is addressed it says “your own husbands” Women do not submit to men in general, this is for the home.
  • Submission is not Slavery- it doesn’t mean silence! You can challenge, you can have opinions, it’s not slavery. Read Proverbs 31, a strong women!

2) What Submission IS.

    • The word found in v1 and v5 is the greek word “hypotasso” and it is a military term in regards to arranging order. What is important is the tense that it is in the greek, it’s voluntary.

APP> So what is submission? Submission is a voluntary yielding that is motivated by love. *ILL- Think of it this way, anyone been on township line Rd to see the new round -about? what’s all around, yield signs! What happens if you don’t yield, a wreck.

APP> Ladies, God has designed you in such a way that when a collision of opinions and leadership is about to happen, that you have the power and control, to make that not happen.

3) What Submission looks like.

  1. Walk over Talk. v1-3 – Peter says that the most natural way that you as a women want to go about changing your husband is the best way to ruin your marriage. Men’s sinful bent is to neglect their wives, Women sinful bent is to nag their husbands. “Let the husband  see the word as his wife lives it out in the context of their marriage. Here is the real test, Can the wife trust God to save her husband by her silence.?” – Bob Deffinbaughm APP> Nagging your husband will give you to results, 1) An abusive man 2) A Passive man.
  2. Inside over Outside. v3-5 – The word “adoring” here is the greek word cosmos which is wear we get cosmetics. Again, Peter isn’t saying look good is bad, Peter is saying that when the basis of your identity in your marriage is looks… that’s bad. Because everything get’s saggy… even for Kim K. APP> God say’s value the inside over the outside. APP> Ladies, your character set’s the tone of your home. “The word quite is an unusual greek term that means tranquil or undisturbed, like the surface of a lake on a windless afternoon. It describes a heart that is not easily ruffled but the cares and concerns of life. If the husband is the head of the home, the wife is the heart of the home. She sets the emotional tone for the entire family. She sets the tone by her own spirit. Everyone else resonates to the note she sounds. If the home is peaceful, quiet, resentful, it is because the wife has created that atmosphere. If the home is hectic, loud, disorganized and stressful it is also because the wife has set that tone by her own spirit.” – Ray Pritchard

Application Questions:

  • Do you speak negatively about your husband to your friends?
  • Do you contradict and degrade your husband in front of others, particularly your children?
  • Do “submit” only to manipulate later?
  • Do you pout and withhold intimacy from your husband when you don’t get your way?
  • Do you pray for your husband daily? 

C.  Faith over Fear v6 – Peter uses Sarah as an OT example. They moved, crazy stuff, How did she do it? APP> Holy women put their hope in God not their husband. The opposite of trust is not mistrust, the opposite of trust is control.

CLOSE> Did you notice how Peter starts his address to wives? “LikeWise” who is he comparing them to? Jesus, read verse’s 21-25.

Big Idea> Submission is a reflection of Jesus.

  • Read Matthew 26:36-39
  • We were saved through submission, maybe your marriage could be to.       Repent. Confess. Believe.