Philemon Part 3 “The Reconciler” Philemon 1:8-17

INTRO> Long before Courtnee and I got married, we actually didn’t know each other at all. I was at home living at my parents house like many other failed college students. We went to a basketball game on Friday night because that’s what you do in Doniphan. I remember seeing a group of girls walk in and I remembered seeing one in particular! I didn’t know anybody really in the town and my parents where new there. So i was sitting next to a lady that went to my Dad’s church, Phyllis Guthrie, I told Phyllis to go over and ask that girl if she has a boyfriend and that I was asking. Long story short she did have a boyfriend and at the time… but it didn’t take long for that to go by the way side. lol

APP> The reason that I tell you that is this. Courtnee and I didn’t know each other, we needed somebody to bring us together. That’s exactly what we see Paul do here in these verses. On top of that, he is dealing with two believers! We have to understand something today, God’s heart is that people would reconcile.

Why does this matter for you?

• • • Have you ever been hurt? (Philemon)
    • Have you ever hurt somone? (Onesiums)
    • Are you a third party in the middle? (Paul)

• • • “We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.” 2 Corinthians 5:20
    • “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” Matthew 5:20

Big Idea > Reconciliation is the responsibility of every believer.

APP> I know what you are asking, “How in the world do I do something like that?!” We will see from Paul’s point of view how to do this today. In the text we will see A Passion, A proposal, A purpose, A payment.

1. A Passion: for both parties.v10-12

• • • • “I appeal to you for my child Onesimus…” Do you see the type of language that Paul uses for both Onesiums

and Philemon in verses 4-7. Paul has a vested interest in both parties. This is a crucial understanding when it comes to reconciling two parties. APP> “For God does not show favoritism.” Romans 2:11 APP> As agents of reconciliation our ultimate alliegece is to Jesus.

2) A Proposal: to participate. v14

• • • “I prefer to do nothing without you own consent…” Again, we see that Paul is concerned about motivation. He says essentially, “I don’t want to force myself into this situation but I am asking to be apart of this. He is asking for consent.

*ILL> Anytime I do premarital counseling, I always ask how the husband proposed to the wife, I even sometimes do it in marriage counseling, why? Because I want to hear about the process when the woman said yes to the invitation.

APP> There are some situations that you have to be invited into.

3) A Purpose: for God’s glory. v15-16

• • • “For this is perhaps is why….” I love the way Paul breaks this down. He suggests that there is probably something greater going on here than what both parties can see.

*ILL> A good comparison to this is the difference in a microscope and a telescope. Look at this picture of a butterfly with a microscope (PIC) Now look at this picture of the Earth and Moon taken from NASA about 3 million miles away. A microcode zooms in and makes something small, big. A telescope does the opposite, it takes something big and can make is small.

APP> Seeing the purpose’s of God requires a new perspective. Your job in this process as a Reconciler is to try and show these two parties that there is something much bigger going on here. Divore, conflict everything.

4) A Payment: Your own self. v17-19

• • • • “If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything charge that to my account…” Paul does something very interesting here. He says that he is willing to carry either a piece or a whole of the relationship.

APP> I’ve taught this before but relationships often work like banks. We invest in what we love. Those are like deposits, so when it comes time to make a withdrawal… and there is no money in the bank, it’s not going to go well.

*ILL> I remember when i bought my first car at 18. My brother John “co-signed” with me. I was late on a payment and he got a phone call.

APP> Reconciliation requires sacrifice.

Close> Look at the role that Paul is taking on… Paul is simply reflecting Jesus.

“and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, making peace by the blood of his cross.” Colossians 1:20

Big Idea > Reconciliation is the responsibility of every believer.

“Our love ought to follow the love of God in one point, namely, in always seeking to produce reconciliation. It was to this end that God sent his Son. Has anybody offended you? Seek reconciliation. “Oh, but I am the offended party.” So was God, and he went straight away and sought reconciliation. Brother, do the same. “Oh, but I have been insulted.” Just so: so was God: all the wrong was towards him, yet he sent. “Oh, but the party is so unworthy.” So are you; but “God loved you and sent his Son.” 1707.119

Close> Relationship deposit forum.